taxing taxol

so here it is, your on-site reporting on chemotherapy side effects, from the most minute to the grossest stomach churners, from the hangnail to the ear growing out of the elbow, to the alien in the belly (yeah, just kidding. i read too much sci fi).

at any rate, the steroids having worn off (bye bye enhancements...), i now view the real face of taxol and feel its real icy touch. And folks, it ain't bad. Hate to tell u, those of you who like to thrill to cancer grrl's dark victories, compared w/AC, taxol is almost like being a real person....

....it's almost like being a real person who is 85 years old and has about a million arthritic joints...

Yeah, taxol causes joint, muscle and bone pain. And I feel it lordy yes I do. This morning in particular I had to wake up several times and wonder if I had somehow been transported back to the end days of my dance career, when it seemed I was only hired for my facility and brain-dead willingness to toss my body around in ridiculous and injurious ways. I wondered where the ice packs and ibu were, and what time i had to get to rehearsal.

Then it hit me. The good news is, you're not a dancer anymore. The bad news is, you had cancer and are now getting CHEMO!!! Oh yeah, right. forgot.

A couple of hours of yoga later, i feel almost good, though still experiencing the patented chemo exhaustion.

But, I was right. pain beats nausea any day. At least I can eat. And, anyway, pain is familiar. Pain is weakness leaving the body.....(bwahahahaah now who in da world said that?)